Research & Planning: Rough Draft for a Comedy Scene for Second Proposal

We have produced a script for a short scene that highlights the comedic ability of our first proposal. This will help us gauge whether we will be able to write comedy.

Characters:

City man (protagonist): James

Current girlfriend: Jenny

James' Mum: Margaret

James' Dad: Alan

Scene:

[James and Jenny arrive to James' parents house late at night, around 8pm. James knocks on the door and Jenny looks excited to meet James' parents. James' mum, Margaret, opens the door and lets out a squeal in excitement. Margaret grabs her son and holds him tight, all awhile she is inspecting his hair and rubs his sideburns.]

Margaret: "You need a shave love, do they not have razors in the city?"

[James ignores this comment.]

James: "Mum, this is Jenny."

[Jenny, speaking in a very cautious and somewhat nervous tone.]

Jenny: "Helloo..."

[At this point, Alan interrupts Jenny.]

Alan: "James!"

[James goes in for a handshake, but Alan goes for a hug instead. Alan doesn't give James a chance to back out of it.]

Alan: "You put on a bit of timber there son?"

James: "Always a pleasure Dad."

[Close up on Jenny stood looking awkward.]